Social Connection is Essential at Work, Especially for New Hires

May 5

On my first day of work as Our Minds Matter’s Director of Development, I found myself rolling a small foam ball across a table with my colleagues and sharing where I saw goodness in the world. When the ball landed in my hands, I spoke about finding a tiny cardboard craft project my son, who was 5 years old at the time, had made while waiting for dinner to be served the night before. I’d been amazed to find his miniature cardboard parrots and jungle tree while I was cleaning up after he’d gone to bed; I marveled that he’d reached an age where he no longer showed me all of his creative endeavors – not to mention that he’d managed to use scissors to cut out parrots smaller than my thumbnail from an Amazon box.

I was also amazed to find myself sharing this story with my colleagues – some I’d met just moments before this activity began. As we continued to roll the ball, I learned where they saw goodness in the world – in their families, their pets, in their ability to cope with challenging life situations, and in our organization’s mission-driven work to end teen suicide. And in that very short exercise, my colleague’s personalities and vulnerabilities began to reveal themselves to me in ways that could have taken weeks if not months to unveil under different circumstances.

While on that first day I felt like I’d been thrown into the Evolving Minds program – it was well under way when I joined my organization’s staff – I soon learned that Anthony usually passed around an invisible ball, and only used a foam ball for my benefit.

“The invisible ball can intimidate people at first,” Anthony shared with me later.

But the program did quickly feel second nature for me, even though I’d joined after the rest of the staff had begun. All our meetings began with a different skill, and I still find myself looking forward to the 15 minutes we all spend connecting with one another as human beings before we move onto the business laid out in our meeting agendas.

If you’d asked me 17 years ago when I joined the workforce what it meant to be vulnerable at work, I’d probably have said that my greatest fear was crying in a meeting. I have found myself tearing up during more than one opening connection at Our Minds Matter, because the bond it has helped to form on our team is strong – sometimes to the point of bringing on tears. I feel my colleagues’ joy and pain in equal measure, and I think they feel mine. I have learned not to fear sharing the parts of myself that I used to keep at home, while also maintaining professional boundaries. When the invisible ball is in the air, we can always feel free to pass.

And now, I’ve come full circle. I see goodness in the Evolving Minds program, and I’m grateful that it’s a part of Our Minds Matter’s culture.